


tiny paper cuts

by beforemidnight



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Enemies to Lovers, Fluff, Journalism, M/M, Unresolved Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:07:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26023939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beforemidnight/pseuds/beforemidnight
Summary: Where Doyoung wants to be editor of his university's news publication and thinks that Jaehyun is out to snatch his position.(Ten thinks otherwise)
Relationships: Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten/Qian Kun, Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Comments: 28
Kudos: 190





	tiny paper cuts

**Author's Note:**

> dojae yeehaw

When Doyoung decided to run for the editor in chief position in his university’s paper, it was because he’d been eyeing the seat since freshman year. Overzealous 18-year-old Doyoung 3 years ago was first introduced to the school’s paper through his mentor Joohyun. During that specific school year, all freshmen were required to have an upperclassman mentor to  _ ‘show them the ways of college’  _ and the first thing Joohyun introduced him to was  _ The Advocate _ . Joohyun’s baby. The thing that was on her top priority no matter how stressed she was. There really wasn’t much after that because for one Joohyun was a graduating senior with a stellar gpa, had a really handsome business major boyfriend named Junmyeon that Doyoung scarcely met (Joohyun wasn’t much for public display of affection and that made Doyoung idolize her even more), and a full ride to law school. Joohyun was a busy person but she was there for Doyoung’s first post-exam breakdown, first frat party, first college hookup (that he has adamantly tried to repress) no matter how packed her schedule was, therefore, Doyoung couldn’t really ask for more. 

So,  _ The Advocate _ , the main character of every single one of Doyoung’s wet dreams. He didn’t think that it was an obsession per se. He’s searched about it and Merriam says that the definition of obsession is a persistent disturbing preoccupation, an often unreasonable idea or feeling (yes he has that memorized for argument purposes because Ten was a persistent and annoying motherfucker). No, besides Doyoung knew that rather than obsession his view towards his pursuit had to do with passion. The burning, unequivocal pursuit of transparent and equitable journalism really got his gears going. And also because he’d rather have his dick eviscerated than let Jeong Jaehyun get the EIC position. 

“Doyoung, I swear to God I will throw your stupid laptop and set fire to this apartment if you don’t go to this party with me.” 

Ten. The person Doyoung never thought he’d consider his best friend. If Doyoung was the embodiment of anal-retentive, Ten was the exact opposite. The type of anal expulsive that would have been punched by Doyoung already if not only for the fact that Ten is his best friend and he wouldn’t trade that bitch for the world.

“Ten. Can you shut up for one second. The moment that I have been praying for since freshman year when you were still trying to make justin bieber’s hair chic has arrived, Ten. I cannot lose this position. You know that.”

“First of all. I didn’t copy Justin Bieber, my bangs had a life of its own. Second. I don’t know how many times I’ve said this before but Taeil trusts you. You’ve been working with him since sophomore year. Stop being a bitch and get drunk with me.”

“Jeong.” He can already feel Ten rolling his eyes. 

Doyoung let his eyes leave the screen to meet Ten’s. 

“What about him?”

“He’s out to get my position and I’d be damned before he even gets to sit on the special chair the newsroom has for the editor.”

“Doyoung. Sweetie. You’ve lost your mind.”

“Ten. You have no idea how infuriating this man is. He walks into the room like he’s hot shit when he doesn’t even have the ass for it. Yeah okay he has a good gpa but it’s not like it’s higher than mine. And I bet he gets help from one of those sketchy companies that bombard the school email, those get your own math 21.11, math 100.33, finance 33 tutor because he has to protect this perfect untouchable image he’s put to himself.”

“Doyoung,” Ten chided.

“You know what, I think he’s part of those sketchy companies. What if we try to search them up and see if his name is —”

“DOYOUNG!”

“WHAT?”

“You have a new email.”

He turned his swivel chair and clicked on the new unread email on his screen. This is it. The moment that will—

“No” Doyoung felt the onset symptoms of a heart attack starting. Trust him, his mother is a nurse.

“What? Why?—"

“—Don’t tell me you got booted out of the team because that would be hilarious.”

“No” 

“Then why the fuck do you have the same face you had when you saw me and Kun fooling around in the bathroom.—"

“—Did you lose? Did Jaehyun get the position?”

Doyoung gulped and ran his hands in his hair. Doyoung has had his fair share of what the fuck moments in college life so far— when he got drunk once and woke up with his hair dyed bright violet, when he was presenting in one of his classes and accidentally played the porn Ten was watching the night prior, and when he had to hide a girl inside his cramped closet before his mother arrived for her surprise visits (the girl was nice about it though. Bless Sejeong.) But nothing tops this moment. He felt as if all his organs had dropped from their specific position in his body. His soul probably left 30 seconds into reading the email.

“No. It’s worse.” 

“I’m coeditors with Jeong fucking Jaehyun.”

  
  


🗞

  
  


"Doyoung, is there any update about the paper? Are you alright?" Kun tried to ask him in the most non irritating way he could attempt but knowing Doyoung it's probably futile because anything that merely mentions Jaehyun and Newspaper in a single sentence makes him want to rip his eyes out.

"Hey. You know you can talk to us right. Ten has been worrying about you, you know. Don't tell him this but he was three seconds away from killing Jaehyun yesterday," Kun added.

As usual Doyoung's Jaehyundar (Ten named this he didn't have the energy to object) was set off.

"Why are you even meeting that bread face in the first place? Are you friends? Kun you are Ten's boyfriend and in extension you are my ally too. Jeong is a Class A target. We do not engage with any contact with him unless it's about beating his flat ass."

"Don't tell me you didn't know?"

"Didn't know what? I hate not knowing things."

" You know that Jaehyun's my cousin, right?”

"What?"

"What what? I thought Ten told you already?"

"Ten knows? And he calls himself my best friend. Where's my lawyer?"

Ten arrived with their drinks in a tray.

"Kun what have you done? Why is his face like this?"

Kun choked on his absurdly expensive coffee. Doyoung didn't even know why he insisted on hanging out in a coffee shop, he didn’t even like coffee that much. Now he had to sit with this new baffling information. Jeong was out to get his friends. That snake!

"What? I was just asking if he was alright!" Kun interjected. 

"I might have mentioned he who must not be named somewhere and slipped the fact that he's my cousin and you never told him." 

Ten gasped, "How dare you say his name! We all know Doyoung has been thinking about ways to kiss—"

Doyoung glared at Ten

"—I mean kill that very attractive and stupid man," Ten dramatically continued.

"Fuck you."

"No you will not in fact fuck me. I have Kun for that. Doie look. Remember when I first introduced you to Kun and the first thing you said to me was 'why are you hanging out with an old crusty professor.' You don't let people in easily and the fact that Jeong is his cousin would probably make you more jittery around him. It took you 5 months to warm up to him. Imagine if I told you about his relationship to Jaehyun."

"That's not true!"

"Shut up let me finish my monologue. What I need you to do is talk to Jaehyun before summer break because this has been going on for the past 3 years and if any of you only mustered the brain cells and the courage to actually talk without spitting fire against each other then we wouldn't be having this lame ass conversion right now in this bourgeois coffee shop. Instead, I would be at Johnny's graduation party getting shitfaced and you wouldn't be as sexually frustrated as my grandfather during the '40s." 

"Baby calm down Doyoung's about to blow."

"I can't even taste the caffeine in this. I only taste the money I lost and could have spent shopping for new jeans," Ten lamented. 

"No. You know what. Ten's right for once in his life. My mother taught me to be polite and take the high road. Jeong might be an asshole but I am in fact not—"

"Debatable," Ten whispered

"Baby, shut up," Kun intervened. 

"—So. I will invite him for coffee as any two reasonable adults do. I'll talk to him and try my best to be a gentleman and not spit on his drink when he goes to the restroom.—"

"There you go. Almost there," Ten sighed.

"And then I'll threaten him to give up his position in the newspaper or I'll leak that he's part of those sketchy tutor companies that spam the university emails."

Ten knocked his head on their table while Kun choked on his coffee (again).

"Let's have ice cream!" He cheerfully announced.

  
  


🗞

  
  


Doyoung ended up not meeting Jaehyun for coffee before he went back home for the summer. Jaehyun was busy doing God knows what for this perfect resume and Doyoung was also busy gathering data for his senior year thesis (yes he doesn't think about his sworn enemy 24/7). 

So, almost a month into his vacation he opened his email and tried to draft a very strong-worded, but totally professional email to his coeditor. For the record, he still hated calling him coeditor but his mother taught him to be polite

**From: kimdy@ateneo.edu**

**To: jeongjh@ateneo.edu**

**Subject: The Advocate 2020-2021**

Dear Jackass,

Ten wants me to make amends and my mother taught me to be nice and I love my mom so I'm sending this email. I've been thinking about the changes I want to implement for this school year and even though your opinion is irrelevant, I would like to know your insights about them. Attached is the file containing the whole proposal. Please read everything as well as the footnotes. Also, I hope you CHOKE.

Doyoung thought that he had to finesse the wording a little more. After several attempts and a few failed lame heckles, he finally settled with a boring draft. 

**From: kimdy@ateneo.edu**

**To: jeongjh@ateneo.edu**

**Subject: The Advocate 2020-2021**

Dear Jeong Jaehyun,

I hope this email reaches you well. I've been thinking about the changes I want to implement for this school year. I would like to know your insights about them. Attached is the file containing the whole proposal. Please read everything as well as the footnotes.

Best,

Kim Doyoung

After a few minutes and three strawberry-mango popsicles, a new email notification appeared on his screen.

**From: jeongjh@ateneo.edu**

**To: kimdy@ateneo.edu**

**Subject: The Advocate 2020-2021**

Dear Doyoung,

I hope you're having a great summer so far! I've read the file you sent me. I like the new proposed ideas but there are some points I would like to clarify. I also have some suggestions for a couple more changes we could implement for better student reception. Attached is the file with my comments.

I know you didn't have the best reaction when you heard the news. But I think we will do great for this semester. Junmyeon sends his regards. Also, wouldn't you think it's convenient for us to exchange numbers since we'll be working together?

P.S 

Ben and Jerry's released a netflix and chill inspired ice cream, I think you'd like it.

Respectfully yours,

Jaehyun

Here are some facts about Jeong Jaehyun.

Doyoung first met him through Junmyeon, Joohyun's perfect business major boyfriend. See, what Doyoung is to Joohyun is what Jeong is to Junmyeon. Doyoung hardly ever cared about that fact until Jaehyun started tailing Joohyun and Doyoung. He believed that Jeong wasn't satisfied with one mentor and wanted Joohyun's attention as well. 

And that ladies and gentlemen was when Jeong decided to make his life a living hell, Doyoung conspired.

Jeong wanted to take the newspaper away from him because Doyoung promised Joohyun that he would eventually take over the paper. Jeong really wanted Doyoung to be miserable. There was no other explanation for this.

"What are you doing?" Someone from the door asked. Donghyuck peeked at his screen and groaned. 

"Ugh. It's your last summer break before you graduate college and all you do is work," Donghyuck said, collapsing on the bed.

"I'm not working. I'm at war with someone. I'm trying to write a perfect response with the right amount of insult without trying to get myself censored or worse suspended."

"Is that about the Jaehyun dude again?" Donghyuck buried his head in one of Doyoung's pillows.

"What do you think about this?  _ Your suggestions are welcome but I don't really give a fuck-  _ "

"Ugh of course it's him. You're so lame hyung," Donghyuck added. 

"Anyway. So I've been added to this freshman group chat for my course and I started talking to someone."

"Donghyuck."

"What? I'm not even finished yet. So as I was saying. I've been talking to a block mate. His name is Mark. He's kinda nice and has a sibling the same year as you in Ateneo too."

"Oh really? That's great. At least you're making friends already but be careful still okay? University is different, just because they're nice at first doesn't mean they'll end up as your friend. Some may turn out to be assholes who want to steal your position."

"Stop projecting. You're killing my vibe here." 

"Anyway, ask for his sibling's name, I might know them." Doyoung went back to glaring at his computer

"Sure. I think he mentioned that they were also part of the newspaper. But I'm not certain. I'll ask him again," Donghyuck walked out of his room

"Oh, by the way, mom said lunch is ready."

**From: kimdy@ateneo.edu**

**To: jeongjh@ateneo.edu**

**Subject: The Advocate 2020-2021**

Dear Jeong Jaehyun,

Greetings. Your suggestions are noted. We will finalize the new policies once the school year starts. However, I can't help but notice that part about Junmyeon hyung. Are you still in touch? Not that I care but he's Joohyun noona's boyfriend. You know what it's whatever. I'll see you in September. Also, I think it's best if we keep our conversations in our email. 

P.S

I have tried the new ice cream flavor but it's not on a par with my favorites.

P.P.S

Why did you mention that anyway? (Not that I care.) 

Best,

Kim Doyoung

  
  


🗞

  
  


As per Donghyuck's description of this Mark Lee: he apparently had round glasses, wore nothing but hoodies, had unruly and wavy hair, and was always on the verge of falling asleep. Doyoung approached a kid on the table at the left most corner of the cafe that was on the precipice of knocking out.

"You're Mark?" He asked.

The kid had to blink twice before digesting Doyoung's presence.

"Oh. Hello. Sir. Yes I'm Mark Lee. Hyuck is getting drinks, sir," Mark sputtered.

"Dude. I'm like 3 years older than you. It's chill. Besides, my brother has been mentioning you nonstop since summer. I probably know too much about you already."

"He did?" Mark blushed.

"Yeah. Don't tell him that or I'll really make you call me sir," Doyoung said.

Mark laughed nervously. Doyoung thought the kid was adorable.

"So. I heard you have a sibling in this university as well? What's his major?" Doyoung got his phone to type a quick text to Ten.

"Oh yeah haha. Uhm, he's actually my stepbrother. My mom married his dad 5 years ago. But we're close. And I never had a brother figure to look up to so he’s extra protective and all."

"Ah that's very sweet of him. Sometimes I just think about strangling Donghyuck when he talks back to me you know."

"Haha. I think that's what makes him cute to be honest. But anyway, my brother actually works for the school paper, I think you might know him he's the-"

"You are now graced by my presence. Hello Mark. Brother." Donghyuck sat and handed Mark his coffee.

"Why is he talking like this?" Doyoung asked.

"He's been practicing his audition piece for the repertory," Mark answered.

"Ah. Go figure. Donghyuck, where's my drink?" 

"Yo Mark." Doyoung heard behind him.

He thought he was dreaming because he was perfectly familiar with that voice— smooth and incredibly low. He's dreamt of that voice (not like that, maybe, that's not important right now).

Jeong Jaehyun sat beside him and across Donghyuck who was seated next to Mark. Doyoung was pretty sure he wore a thick hoodie because it was chilly when he went out so why was it suddenly getting hot.

"Hi," Jaehyun greeted.

He looked at his face for the first time in what felt like weeks. How dare he look so cute in his plain… black... shirt.

"You changed your hair." Out of all the things Doyoung could have said. Jesus. 

Jaehyun met his stare.

"Yeah I did. Does it look bad?" Jaehyun made a sorry attempt to tame his curls.

Doyoung felt like he had been ambushed.

"No. Why are you here?" Jaehyun had the nerve to blush? Why was he blushing?

Donghyuck nervously chuckled in front of him

"I might have omitted some information." 

"Hyung, Jaehyun hyung is my brother. The one we're talking about before." Mark only smiled.

"You were talking about me?" Jaehyun had the nerve to smile. 

Doyoung had to do something and he quickly thought of two options in his head 1. Pretend to pass out 2. Fake a sudden amnesia. However, before he could respond, Jaehyun stood.

"Where are you going?" 

"I'm gonna get us drinks," Jaehyun answered.

"I'll go with you." What prompted Doyoung to utter these words, he honestly didn’t know.

Jaehyun was taken aback by Doyoung, clearly not expecting the other to accompany him.

"So. What do you want to eat?" Jaehyun asked.

"Uh. I'll have a banana split. I’m not really a fan of coffee," Doyoung replied absentmindedly. There were three people ahead of them in the queue.

The first thing Doyoung ever noticed about Jaehyun way back in first year was his dimples. He may have had a slight prejudice towards the man, but his dimples sure were something Doyoung had always been drawn to.

"You know this is a coffee shop. I'm pretty sure they don't serve-"

And the fact that Doyoung had a front-row seat of the view was something his brain couldn't compute.

"Dimples," Doyoung suddenly said louder than anticipated.

-ice cream. What?" Jaehyun was startled.

"Nothing. I said I picked this cafe when Hyuck suggested a meetup. I know they serve ice cream here," He replied. 

"I see. So… uhm, I don't know if this is the right time for us to have this conversation but the pitch meeting is tomorrow and I want to apologize beforehand because I won't be able to go."

The line moved. There are only two people ahead.

"I have an important volunteering event that I have to attend to. I really would rather be at the pitch meeting with you but this has been scheduled since before classes started."

"It's okay," Doyoung replied. A look of indifference etched in his face.

"For real?" Jaehyun asked, surprised by the reaction.

"Yeah. I guess your volunteering event is more important than the newspaper for you. That's not really something I can’t argue you know. I know your priorities now," Doyoung said.

"Doyoung look-" Jaehyun sighed.

"Jeong. It's really okay. I'll send you a copy of the minutes of the meeting or whatever. You're alright ordering by yourself, no? I'll go to the restroom first."

It's such a silly thing for Doyoung to have thought for a second that the asshole was serious about the newspaper. Volunteering, what a shitty excuse. Doyoung convinced himself that the heavy feeling in his gut was because the man had to lie to his face about doing charity work. He reminded himself that he didn’t have the right to be disappointed because he didn't even want Jaehyun to play a part in the paper. So he should be happy, right?

When Doyoung came back to the table, Jaehyun was already seated. He tried his best to keep his temper at bay.

“Doyoung.” 

“Not now,” Doyoung vehemently replied. He kept his stare ahead as to not see the reaction of the younger. He realized he might have come off a little harsh. 

“Doyoung hyung. I know it’s not my place to say but I’m really sorry for keeping my brother from your meeting tomorrow,” Mark quietly said.

“What are you talking about?” 

“Mark you don’t have to—” Jaehyun interrupted.

“No. There’s a dog shelter that Jaehyun and I always volunteer at. We weren’t expecting the date to clash with your schedule. We’re so sorry,” The kid seemed to be really scared of him. Christ.

“Oh God. Please don’t cry. It’s okay. I don’t mind. There are plenty of meetings for him to attend in the future anyway,” Doyoung immediately said back.

“Really?” The kid beamed. 

“Yeah. Uh, can I excuse Jaehyun for a second. We need to talk about some serious journalistic issues outside.” Doyoung got his ice cream (that was thankfully placed in a paper cup) and dragged Jaehyun by the arm outside the shop. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Doyoung asked.

“I told you I was gonna go volunteering!” Jaehyun replied aghast. 

“For dogs?” 

“For puppies actually.” Doyoung wanted to die

“Rescued puppies if you want to be specific.” His dimples were showing again. Doyoung be strong.

“How am I supposed to be mad at you when you’re volunteering for rescued puppies. You couldn’t have mentioned that, really?” Doyoung took a huge bite of his ice cream.

“You seemed so upset. I didn’t want to push you any further. Besides I didn’t want to ruin your time with your brother.” Doyoung took another huge bite of his banana split. He felt conflicted.

“Are you mad at me?” Jaehyun scooted a little bit closer. 

“No. How can I be mad at you when you’re gonna take care of puppies. I’m not satan.”

“Are you sure?”

“You think you’re funny?” Jaehyun only smiled. Fuck those dimples. 

Both welcomed a few minutes of silence, taking in the chill September afternoon. Jaehyun only sighed. Unbeknownst to Doyoung, Jaehyun's gaze was only on  _ him _ .

“C’mon let’s go back. It’s freezing here,” Doyoung announced.

Doyoung was a few steps away from the door when Jaehyun called him.

“If it’s any consolation, I hope you know that if the event tomorrow didn’t involve Mark, I wouldn’t hesitate to cancel. It’s just, he’s my brother. He’s important to me. I’m sure you understand.” Doyoung stared at the door. He can feel the weight of Jaehyun’s gaze.

He looked back and smiled.

“C’mon bread face, my ice cream is melting.”

Doyoung hoped that Jaehyun knew that this was the closest thing he was getting to an apology. 

  
  


🗞

  
  


"Where's Jaehyun?" Ten asked as he strode across the empty newsroom. The pitch meeting just ended and Doyoung was the only one left. He didn't notice the darkness outside. Odd.

"He's with puppies or was. I don't really know how long his thing is" 

"Why don't you text him?" 

If there is an award for being the most privy, Ten would win, no doubt.

"Because I don't have his number, Ten"

Doyoung saw how Ten's eyes grew wide. He didn't know his best friend's eyes could do that.

"Why don't you have your coeditor's number? That's absurd!" 

"Why would I need to have that kind of personal contact with him. It's completely unnecessary."

"I'm no Sherlock but I'd guess because both of you are literally the bosses of your team? How do you guys communicate then?"

"Email."

"Damn. I know I compare you to my grandfather a lot but this just takes the cake."

Ten was laughing. Doyoung wasn't sure if he felt offended. He talked to Ten's grandfather once. He was super nice.

Ten handed his phone to Doyoung.

"Here." 

"What do I do with this?"

"That is Jaehyun's number. You know this is the kind of situation that requires you to have his number. You're obviously swamped and I'm pretty sure petting dogs doesn't go until this late." 

"No. I don't want it."

"You don't want his number. Or you don't want to text him?"

"Neither. Ten. What I want is total silence. Okay. I can handle this. I don't need him right now. He's busy with his brother."

Ten's ear perked up.

"Come again? Did… did you just say you don't need him RIGHT NOW. Did I hear you just imply that you don't want to disturb his time with his brother? Holy shit Doyoung are you sick?"

"Ten. The door is there. You're really free to go."

"Fine. I'm shutting up. Just admit that you care about him. It's not a big deal." The last part didn't go unnoticed to Doyoung but Ten didn't have to know that.

"Why do you have his number anyway. The last time I checked you guys aren't the best pals?" Doyoung started sorting some papers on his desk.

"He's basically my brother in law. He's Kun's cousin, remember. We hang out when you're out."

"That's rude."

"Nah. Even if I invited you. You wouldn't even do anything but stare at your food and curse at his back. Don't bullshit me Doie." 

"Yeah you're right."

Ten changed his tone a little when he started speaking again.

"But hey. You know Jaehyun isn't really that bad. He asks about you sometimes. I think you should give him a ch-"

Both heard a crashing sound on the door. Jaehyun was panting, a sheen of sweat covering his face. 

"Hi. Uhm. I'm sorry. I had to run from the eagle gym to uh here. Some puppies were in a bad mood," Jaehyun explained a bit breathlessly. He was looking at Doyoung.

"You were tending puppies that's so cute!" Ten exclaimed.

"Hi Ten!" Jaehyun smiled.

"Hello loverboy!" Ten greeted back.

"Well I'm gonna go since Doyoung here won't be alone anymore, I'll go back to my boyfriend now. See you back home bitch."

And with that Ten left, leaving Jaehyun and Doyoung alone in the newsroom.

"Uh you want some water? I have water," Doyoung offered. Jaehyun walked and stood beside his desk.

"Nah I'm fine. Just a bit sweaty. So, what pitches did you hear earlier?" Jaehyun had to scoot down to read the outlines. Damn Arial 12. Why couldn't they have used 24 or something?

"Uh. Uhm. There was something for the new science complex building and an editorial about the new student council bill on free speech, and uh-" Jaehyun placed his other arm on the table caging Doyoung.

" - a review of the new cooking personnel hired by the dorm cafeterias." Doyoung made the mistake of looking up and seeing Jaehyun so concentrated on the paper. Doyoung wasn't really one for kinks but seeing Jaehyun so invested in journalism made him gulp. Why the fuck was he not moving.

Jaehyun's eyebrows were knitted together in concentration. "I think rather than just a plain review of the cafeterias, it would be better if Jungwoo goes deep into the whole system of the new dorm cafeteria. How the personnel gets paid, what they consider when picking menus, the safety. I think that would give the students a better understanding of the importance of cafeterias and why the previous operators were fired."

Doyoung was speechless.

"What do you think?" Jaehyun turned his gaze at him.

Doyoung thought that he smelled so good despite all the sweat. Holy hell."Can you give me space first. You're a little sweaty." 

"Oh shit. I'm sorry." Jaehyun looked scandalized. 

"It's alright I was just feeling warm. I, uhm, agree. That's a great idea. I'll make sure to pass that to him."

Doyoung looked anywhere except at the other boy.

"Doyoung, why are you nervous?"

"I'm not. What are you saying?"

"You do this thing where you bite your lower lip. I've seen you do that multiple times. Why are you suddenly nervous?" Jaehyun looked curiously at his lips.

Doyoung stood up and made a beeline to the water dispenser.

"I-"

Jaehyun followed him.

"Are you perhaps nervous because we're alone." Jaehyun stepped closer. Why was Doyoung stepping back? This is not 50 shades of grey.

"I'm-"

_ "The wheels on the bus go round and round."  _ Doyoung's phone began ringing.

"Donghyuck. That little shit." Doyoung closed his eyes and walked past Jaehyun. 

"Never knew you were into nursery rhymes." 

"Shut up, my brother thinks it's hilarious when he did this." Doyoung answered.

"What do you need?" Doyoung excused himself. He didn't know if it was fatigued but he thought he clearly saw Jaehyun banging his head against the wall.

The atmosphere earlier was gone when Doyoung came back. Jaehyun was busy reading some papers.

"Jeong. Let's close for tonight. I know you're tired." 

"Alright. Uhm by the way. I know you prefer email but I think it really would be more productive if we exchange numbers so I could easily inform you about-" Jaehyun argued.

"Okay fine. Fine. We're exchanging numbers. Let's get out of here." 

Doyoung went home that night with a new contact on his phone and some really annoying butterflies in his stomach (he tried to convince himself it was from hunger but Doyoung was never the best liar).

  
  


🗞

  
  


Here are some facts about Doyoung.

He loved writing. That was the main reason why he majored in Journalism. When he was young, everyone always complained about how he never seemed to shut up. So to stop the complaints he was receiving, he poured all his energy into writing. 

Joohyun knew this. That was why one summer afternoon during the second semester of his freshman year when they were left alone on their table while Junmyeon and Jaehyun got their food, Doyoung promised Joohyun that he would be editor. 

Another thing you should know about Doyoung is that he could be very pissy when asked too many questions. This was the reason why he didn't sign up to be a mentor and why he didn't want a coeditor. He was well suited for working alone.

"Doyoung. Do you really think that we shouldn't ask the teaching and non-teaching staff's stance on this?"

Jaehyun was once again standing beside Doyoung's desk. He developed the habit of doing this in the past months of working together.

"I've said this multiple times and I'm not repeating it again, Jeong. We are trying to analyze the student body's reaction towards the plan of the council on reducing the 5 school days into 4. Gathering data from students is already taking too much time. We can't afford to add more respondents. There's just not enough time," Doyoung argued.

"But the whole purpose of this piece is to show a general consensus of how the change would impact the whole university community. The last time I checked, students are not the only people around this campus."

Doyoung felt a throb in his head. They were 2 weeks from publishing their first issue for the school year. Both didn't want to fuck things up.

"I'm not saying you're wrong Jeong. I'm trying to make you understand for the 50th time that the clock just doesn't permit us to accomplish what you want. Sicheng and his team are already begging for an extension because getting concrete numbers is not easy." 

"Don't you think I know that? I'm from Management Doyoung, I deal with numbers every waking moment of my life. Stop being intransigent for one second-"

"You. How dare you. You're calling me intransigent? I'm working with you. I never even agreed to be your coeditor in the first place Jeong. I compromised." 

Doyoung was now fuming

"You gotta be kidding me. You're still bitter about the position. Doyoung. I never coerced you into doing this with me. You could have asked me to step down and I would have done it if that made you happy." Doyoung had never seen Jaehyun in this state of uneasiness. It was as if he was running on emergency energy and Doyoung was draining him quickly.

"Oh so now I'm the bad guy. I was just trying to be pragmatic Jeong Jaehyun. You wanted bold. I wanted accuracy. Do you think I'm questioning your ability to get shit done? No. I'm only trying to stop you from making harsh decisions like asking Sicheng to interview 80 more people when the guy is exhausted and you're clearly not thinking straight. Jeong we're both running on nothing but caffeine. But I guess I'm being the big bad wolf again. Fine. Bite me." 

"Okay." Doyoung was already about to argue another point.

"What?" Doyoung was so confused and tired.

"Okay." Was the last thing that Doyoung heard when a pair of soft lips touched his and felt a hand at the back of his neck. Doyoung wouldn't even know who the culprit was because his eyes were immediately drawn shut but it was really late and Jaehyun was the only one in the newsroom with him. So one can figure.

Doyoung kissed back, nipping at Jaehyun's lower lip, directing the attention of his hands on Jaehyun's waist, the other hand caressing his arm. He felt Jaehyun nudge him towards the table. Jaehyun's other arm was settled on the flat surface of the table supporting his weight, trapping Doyoung between himself and the desk. Jaehyun continued peppering Doyoung's neck with light feather kisses that got Doyoung to whimper. 

The sound however sobered up Jaehyun and swiftly disentangled himself from a very fazed, thoroughly kissed Doyoung.

"Fuck. Shit. Fuck. I'm so sorry." Jaehyun exclaimed. 

"What. I. I don't understand." 

"It wasn't supposed to happen this way. Shit. I'm sorry." 

"I feel like I've already seen this happen before." Doyoung bitterly chuckled.

"Doyoung." Jaehyun tried to come closer.

"Don't come near me," Doyoung bitterly replied and Jaehyun immediately retreated. He looked so pale and tired.

" _ Jaehyun  _ . You're doing it again. You slept with me 4 years ago and this was exactly what you said to me.  _ 'It wasn't supposed to happen this way.' Jaehyun. I  _ don't know what you want from me but I'm tired." Doyoung felt tears damp on his cheeks. He was just so exhausted.

" Doyoung.  _ Baby  _ . Please. Just. I need you to listen to me. Please let me explain." 

Doyoung faced the ceiling and sighed.

"This is what we're going to do. I'll go home. We forget this ever happened. We're going back tomorrow to finalize this shit. I don't think I'm in the right mind to make decisions." Doyoung wiped his face with his sleeves.

"Doyoung, please." Jaehyun was rooted on his position, his head between his hands. He looked so so tired. They both were.

"This game. I can't play it anymore. You win. I'm done." Doyoung looked straight into his eyes for the last time before shutting the door.

The origin of one's paper cut is hardly ever realized. They're so thin and translucent that it gets to be noticed only after one has accumulated a lot. Doyoung looked at his hand and noticed a tiny paper cut in his finger. It's not anything like the one he got while chopping onions nor the one that appeared when he accidentally bit his finger while snacking. So he was confused why this paper cut didn't hurt any less. 

🗞

  
  


After sleeping for more than 10 hours and skipping his 3 classes for the day, Doyoung felt a little better. Ten didn't question why he looked like a zombie when he arrived at the door a little before midnight last night. He let Doyoung cry in his bed and slept beside him. He even made eggs for breakfast. Doyoung didn't know Ten knew how to open a stove. 

What Doyoung didn't do, however, was check his phone. He figured if he had to deal with his newspaper responsibilities he'd do it later when he went to the office but for now, it was lunchtime and he'd rather focus on his omelet rather than think about anyone let alone Jeong fucking Jaehyun.

But the universe really hated Doyoung because as he was about to take a bite of his omelet the doorbell rang. He prayed to God that it wasn't Jaehyun. He looked like the epitome of disaster. He wouldn't want to let him into this house while he was looking like a hobo.

"What are you wearing Doie. You look like shit." 

"Joohyun noona. What are you doing here?"

Joohyun, the woman who made everyone fall to their knees with one glance. The person who guided Doyoung all throughout his naive juvenile beginnings and quite frankly the last person he wanted to talk to right now.

"No I miss you noona? No, I've been waiting for you to visit me? Not even a single tear? I thought you loved me?" 

"Aren't you supposed to be shouting at oligarchs. Why are you here?"

"Because law school is tiring and it's been a while since we last had a chat."

"We text almost everyday noona."

"And because my boyfriend called me at 3 am. He told me that Jaehyun called him and was crying about you, again," Joohyun said, blowing her new manicured nails.

“Noona. It’s lunchtime and I have yet to eat anything. I really don’t want to be talking about him with an empty stomach.” Doyoung groaned and went back to his omelet. Joohyun followed him to his Kitchen Island. She sat across Doyoung and grabbed a slice of bagel. 

With a mouth full of omelet Doyoung suddenly spoke, "Jaehyun's an asshole who can't stand up for his actions, noona. He kissed me and made it seem like a vile mistake. This isn’t the first time he’s done this. I can’t keep making myself vulnerable when he treats me like a goddamn game all the time. I trusted him in the newspaper, he knew how important it was to me and yet." Doyoung bit his cheek suppressing the urge to punch a wall. 

"Doyoung. Jaehyun might be a coward but he's not a bad person. Your relationship with him is complicated I know but you really gotta start giving the guy a chance."

" I gave him a chance. He called me intransigent!"

"I'm talking about a real chance Doyoung. We both know from the beginning that you had one foot out the door for Jaehyun. You didn't give him a chance because you were waiting for him to disappoint you again so you can have a reason to reject him. That’s not healthy"

" Well you're not my therapist are you?"

"But I was and will always be your first college friend Doyoung. Even if I was your mentor, I understood you because I saw myself in you. You and I we're both unstoppable. We're overachievers. And I'm telling you, you made it. You're the editor. I'm so proud of you but now you have to stop trying to make me proud because I already was even before. You deserve to be happy. Let go for once. I swear it's not that bad." Joohyun stood up and hugged Doyoung. They were never huggers. But this felt more than a hug. Doyoung finally felt free of the burden on his shoulders.

Atlas can have the title back. 

“This will be the last thing I’ll say about this situation, alright? After this, no more Jaehyun drama. My boyfriend and I have been stressing about you two for 4 years already. You never want to be vulnerable, Doyoung—”

“Outch?” 

“—and there is a reason why you and Jaehyun aren’t together yet after all these years. You don’t want to be hurt and Jaehyun’s scared shitless of hurting you. Don’t rob yourself of a chance for happiness, hmmm.”

"You think Jaehyun would make me happy?" Doyoung mumbled on Joohyun's shoulder.

"Hell no. Not all the time anyway. Junmyeon makes me mad sometimes. He's too clingy, you know and he's so fucking sloppy but he tries, he understands me and he makes me smile. That's more than enough for me. So hear him out, Doyoung. Okay?"

"Okay.

  
  


🗞

  
  


Jaehyun was waiting for Doyoung on one of the stools outside the library. Doyoung said in his text that they would meet at 5 pm. It was 4:50 (Doyoung is a punctual person) and Jaehyun was already there. The other didn’t notice his arrival until the scrapping of the metal chair against the floor was heard. 

Jaehyun was sporting a deep flush when he looked up to Doyoung. His ears were so red. 

“Talk,” Doyoung said, crossing his arms over his chest. 

“Remember during first year when all I did was follow you and Joohyun noona even when you clearly didn’t like me at all.”

"I never said I disliked you."

“Yeah but you weren’t fond of me either. Anyway, why do you think I did that? Why do you think I spent my free time following you both even during the times Junmyeon hyung wasn’t around.

“Because you wanted to take my mentor away from me. Easy,” Doyoung answered.

Jaehyun chuckled in disbelief. “That's. After all these years. You really think that was the reason?”

“It was pretty clear that you wanted to compete with me Jaehyun. You were in every organization I joined. You kept appearing in places I never thought you’d be in. What could I have possibly concluded from your actions?”

Jaehyun scooted his chair closer. “Doyoung. I know that you might have misunderstood my intentions before and I’m really sorry for that but did it ever occur to you that the reason why I was always trying to be wherever you were was because I liked you?”

“No you didn’t”

“Doyoung, yes I did and I still do. I know I’m a coward and I keep hurting you because of it. I only ever said those words last night because I didn’t want you to think that I just wanted to kiss you or that I was messing with you because I want you. I do. It’s been almost 4 years since I first met you and I've never stopped wanting you since.”

Doyoung had never been confessed to before except for that time during his 2nd year in high school but it turned out that the guy really wanted was just a tutor and not a boyfriend.

He felt something stir in his gut.

"Last night wasn't the only time you said those words before. And my God Jaehyun. You're telling me you've liked me all this time but you have to understand that you slept with me 3 years ago and you said that  _ that wasn't supposed to happen.  _ You can't blame that part of me for hating you."

"I don't. And I will do everything that I can to make up for that. If you let me." 

Doyoung started chuckling. He didn't know what prompted this reaction. But he was laughing, eyes closed, his gums on full display this time.

"I'm sorry. I. Ten told me months ago that if we only talked calmly without fighting, I wouldn't be as sexually constipated as his grandfather in the '40s." 

Doyoung stared at Jaehyun who had bags under his eyes. He's wearing one of his stupid black shirts again and a hat to hide his perm. He looked sleep-deprived. He looked so genuine. He looked beautiful.

"I'm sorry for accusing you of sabotaging my position in the paper. I just thought that you wanted to take it away from me and I got defensive. If there's someone who knows how important this is to me aside from Joohyun noona, it's you. It was the only thing that came out of my mouth when I was with her."

Jaehyun held both of Doyoung's hands. Doyoung doesn't like it when people touch him but let Jaehyun's hands cover his. Jaehyun's warmth was a nice contrast to Doyoung's eternally cold palms. 

"I only ever joined the team because I wanted to be part of something you love. I couldn't have you so I figured I'll let myself have this. I got selfish. I wanted to be in the room and see you do something you're passionate about. I never thought Taeil hyung would make me coeditor. But if you still want me gone, just say the word, Doyoung."

"I'm only firing you if you will insist on adding more respondents to the survey Mr. BS Management Honors. I'm trying to keep Sicheng from killing us both so don't push it."

Doyoung didn't know that Jaehyun's ears could go redder. It was getting alarming. "About that. I think I went a little insane last night. We had been staying until midnight in the newsroom for the past 4 days and I thought you hated me. Let's forget that ever happened." 

"You're stupid. You know that? God, if you weren't so cute I would've killed you already."

"Only for you, baby."

"Stop calling me that!"

"You don't like it?"

"I didn't say that!! -"

"-For the record, I think I liked you first." Doyoung whispered.

"Was it the dimples?"

"I hate you."

  
  


🗞

**From: Kun**

**To: Doyoung**

Finished reading the new issue Doyoung!! Congratulations! 

Do you guys want to go out for dinner tomorrow? Ten says bring Jaehyun!

  
  


Thanks, Kun! Sure!

  
  


**From: Satan’s long lost sibling**

**To: Doie**

Quick! Do you think I look better in green or purple?

Give me context, bitch.

Kun and I’s 3rd year anniversary is coming.

You really don’t want to know more.

Why am I friends with you?

(purple)

**From: Mark Lee**

**To: Doyoungie Hyung**

Hyung! I got a copy of the new issue! You and Jaehyun hyung 

are so awesome! I can’t wait to read this!

Thank you, Markie! 

Couldn’t have perfected that without your brother’s help! : )

Also, tell hyuck to answer his phone!

**From: Satan himself**

**To: Brother dear**

You’re so lame hyung. Why did you have to text Mark?

We’re in the middle of something here ?!!??!

DONGHYUCK??

HYUNG! We were studying!!!

Kidding. We’re totally not.

**From: Joohyun**

**To: Doyoungie**

Hello my dear, thanks for sending me a copy of the new issue!

I’ll read this after I finish roasting these stupid old men.

Tell Jaehyun I said hello :)

Wreak havoc, noona!

Jaehyun said hi, too : )

**From: jeongjh@ateneo.edu**

**To: kimdy@ateneo.edu**

**Subject: First Month Anniversary!**

Dear baby,

It’s been a month since we got together! Can you believe that? I wanted to tell you this in person or text but you email zoned me for the most of our 4 year… friendship… acquaintanceship...rivalry? You know what, I just think emailing you is cute (you’re cute). I just got my hands on the official printed copy for The Advocate. This feels like almost our first born son, you know! Anyway, let’s go to dinner later and read the newspaper together! I’ll treat you to ice cream after! See you! :)

Yours,

Jae.

  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> angst? idk her!!
> 
> if u made it until the end and didn't cringe, thank u. it's my first attempt at writing a fic like this so please don't be mean tho constructive criticism is always welcome :)
> 
> please leave comments if u enjoyed it!! would love to know your thoughts!!
> 
> *ateneo is a university in the philippines  
> **i know nothing about how universities publish newspapers lol  
> ***everybody loves doyoung !!!
> 
> scream at me on twt: neyowculture


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